Life is full of things that pull our hearts in many different direction…chaos. Some of these things can bring us hope while at the same time bring us to our knees in agony. My desire for this blog is to encourage your heart by being valiantly vulnerable with mine and my chaos of the everyday.
For me, I found this quote from Jane Austen: “I am half agony and half hope,” when I was in a dark time of agony over our infertility. There was the pain of a loss, the pain of wanting something so desperately, and still the hope that there is a future with a child out there, somewhere. The quote just fit life so well, I named my blog after it. (You can read the story of our loss here.)
And as we moved on from the agony of infertility, to the hope of starting a family through adoption, the quote was so meaningful. For us, it is the agony of being unable to have a biological child, the agony of all the unknowns, the agony of all the paperwork, the agony of the waiting…and the hope of what the future might bring. For the birth mother of our child, I’m sure she battled through her own agony as she tried to decide what is best for her child, giving that little bundle over to strangers in hopes of something better than she can provide. And now, as our hopes and dreams have been realized, we now face the daily agony of the right decisions as we raise our son.
But this blog is about more than just infertility and adoption. I also write about what God has whispered to my heart, how He has encouraged me, in hopes of encouraging you. I have been a Christian for most of my life; I remember the hot July day I gave my life over to Him at a bus stop in Arizona when I was about 4 years old with a prayer led by my mom. I’ve been avidly writing in my journals during my quiet times with The Lord since the beginning of high school. And I feel like some of the things He’s given me are meant to be shared. In my 3 part post, Rivers In The Desert, I share some things that He’s been showing me throughout my life.
I also ramble about other things like roller derby, road trips, cooking, simplifying life, organizing, marriage, and now parenting a little boy, along with other random things. My hope is for you to find some encouragement, maybe a laugh or two, and some practical tips on how you can overcome the chaos of everyday life.